Dan and Phil Confirm Relationship After 16 Years

After 16 years of friendship, speculation, and viral fan theories, Dan Howell and Phil Lester have officially confirmed what many suspected: they’ve been in a romantic relationship since 2009. In a video posted on October 13th titled “Is Phan Real? Dan and Phil Reveal the Truth,” Dan opened with, “Alright, let's get this over with. Are Dan and Phil in a relationship?" to which Phil simply answered, “Yes.” Dan joked, “Alright, bye,” before sitting back down to give fans what he jokingly called the juice, the tea, the blood, the tears.

The pair, known for their comedy and gaming content, built their careers side-by-side—hosting radio shows, publishing best-selling books, touring the world, and amassing millions of followers. They also both separately came out in 2019, but had never publicly defined their relationship until now.

“We fell into it hard and fast in 2009, and here we are almost 16 years later,” Dan said.

The two explained that they never labeled things early on, with Dan saying, “We just ended up living together and here we are.” Phil added that they are “partners in everything. It’s not always perfect… Don’t get into your head that we are the ideal of human partnerships.”

Dan got candid about why they waited so long to go public. He spoke about his struggles with growing up closeted and the fear that came with being outed, especially while in a public relationship. “Phil was my safe space… what we had was the most important thing to me and I wanted to protect it,” he said. “Having all of these people trying to out us, and being so hostile to me when I tried to hide it, was so triggering. Honestly, it could have killed me.”

He added that years of suppressing the truth took a toll on his mental health. A recent therapy session finally pushed him to break the silence. “My therapist said, ‘Dan, you love being in the closet’. And I was like, ‘Excuse me?’” he shared. “I am in a cycle of never-ending closets, and this secret conspiracy is just another thing that I'm trapped inside.” Dan also acknowledged the current climate isn’t exactly welcoming, saying, “It feels like things are sliding backwards,” but insisted that made their decision even more important. “Here we are, gay. And what?”

Phil called the announcement “another mini coming out,” and admitted that while fans probably already knew, it was still a “big scary deal” to share. 

Despite finally confirming their relationship, they made it clear they don’t plan to become “couple vloggers in bed.” Their focus is still making people laugh, not romantic oversharing. “A big thing with sharing the details of your personal life is how it affects what you do,” Dan said. “Because Dan and Phil, the comedy duo, and Dan and Phil, the gay boyfriends—it hits different.”

The duo also revealed they’ll be launching a new Dan and Phil podcast, with Phil joking, “15 years of suppressing all of these stories and opinions and they're finally gonna come out.”

Online reaction to the reveal was massive and emotional. One fan wrote, “This is like gay independence day.” Another said, “I’ve literally had to go outside and have a cigarette.” Many reflected on growing up alongside the duo: “I've finished my bachelor's, master's, med school, and a PhD by the time they hard-launched their relationship.” And others simply thanked them: “Thank you for making me feel accepted just as I am throughout the years.” “I'm both very, very happy for you both and feeling a bizarre sense of relief.”

After years of silence, subtle hints, and endless speculation, Dan and Phil are finally sharing their truth—and stepping into a new era, together.